In the dynamics of everyday life, we are all prone to mistakes. Then to realize, it is appropriate to review the facts and learn to correct and make better decisions. Some, however, are characterized by a tendency to repeat their mistakes. Read on.
The mistakes are part of our dynamic life. While we want it right always make the best decision, saying the right thing or have an ideal behavior, many factors interfere with the perfect fulfillment of that expectation, and it is usual mistake, make mistakes sometimes with great frequency. As Dale Carnegie said, “I recognize that I am wrong half the time.”
In principle it should be said that it is not so simple to identify an error, because the consequences of behavior are not always visible, sometimes detected late and sometimes can be complex and multifaceted because each behavior is connected with other in an infinite network of causes and effects. In addition, the peculiar case where what at times seems inappropriate behavior, we can consider, later, as a wonderful decision. In general, the vision of right or wrong is relative to the majority, and there is no agreement yet as to whether things are good or bad in themselves, (as stated in the ethics), or if the results are the define this value (as stated in the teleology).
Assuming it was possible to determine an error under the premise that behavior is inappropriate because it conflicts with our values or affects our goals or those of others, there is a positive side to all this: mistakes can not be regarded as something essentially negative, since much of our learning scheme is based on trial and error, ie to improve through the experience of life, in a process of check and constant improvement. And how do you consider negative things perfect and allows you to evolve?
There are degrees or levels in the errors, as not all produce the same kind of consequences. Some of us are much more expensive than others: Murdering a person, so addictive drug use, developing the bad habit of thinking of oneself or leaving care, are examples of behaviors that consistently generate negative consequences. Others also have side effects, although of lesser importance.
A curious aspect that has studied the psychology is the fact that not all people seek, as one might think, learning to avoid mistakes or to reduce their occurrence. Some ignore them, others refuse, there are those who justify and even those who seem to generate. It does not take a genius to understand that these roads lead safe destination constantly repeating the same mistakes. This is because when we refuse to recognize and overcome our limitations, these appear to us in everyday life in the form of mistakes, failures and conflicts.
Ignore errors is a mental trick, a form of self-deception child pretends to believe that closing the eyes the problems disappear. Denial is often related to fear of facing the consequences of our actions. We know that something went wrong but it puts a mental barrier not to see, more self-deception. Justify a strategy that aims to show another angle of the case, or try to reason despite evidence to the contrary. Couples, lawyers and politicians use it often.
The darker side is that people are so autosaboteadora, create the conditions for the occurrence of events that they know in advance that will leave you in trouble. In psychology this is known as “neurotic behavior” or the neurotic paradox is described as a tendency to do that which is possible to anticipate negative outcome. Exemplary cases of this behavioral style are: drunk today knowing he will miss an appointment to work tomorrow, hitting the couple knowing that they will be reported; violating probation with the understanding that you will lose your freedom and will return to the prison, to borrow money despite knowing that you can afford it. Recurrent pathological behavior that must be addressed from a perspective very serious, in many cases re-education or clinic.
As causal reasons for recurrence of such conduct self-lashing out below: temperament, training or condition. Most of the time is linked to low self-esteem, creating forms of self-punishment that aims to draw attention, as each and desperate destructive act is actually a request or a claim of affection and love, care, recognition, and acceptance badly expressed.
You must understand that always make mistakes, that mistakes are sometimes rapid learning courses, but others, the threshold of consequences that can make life hard and miserable experience. Learn from them, and especially learn to decide, plan to take precautions when necessary, to seek help. Time support can save years of adversity. The best decisions are those taken and above all, they take time. Thanks for reading.
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